GRE作文點評：有讓步反對分層論述

　　Issue 3

　　A nation should require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer.

　　The speaker would prefer a national curriculum for all children up until college instead of allowing schools in different regions the freedom to decide on their own curricula. I agree insofar as some common core curriculum would serve useful purposes for any nation. At the same time, however, individual states and communities should have some freedom to augment any such curriculum as they see fit; otherwise, a nations educational system might defeat its own purposes in the long term.

　　這是一種不同于前兩篇的開頭：先陳述原文觀點，再有讓步地反對。我們要學習的好句子：I agree insofar as 在某種程度我同意此觀點，因為 at the same time, however,接著陳述自己觀點otherwise,

　　Serve useful purposes for

　　see sth. fit, 覺得合適；

　　defeat ones own purpose

　　in the long/short term

　　A national core curriculum would be beneficial to a nation in a number of respects. First of all, by providing all children with fundamental skills and knowledge, a common core curriculum would help ensure that our children grow up to become reasonably informed, productive members of society. In addition, a common core curriculum would provide a predictable foundation upon which college administrators and faculty could more easily build curricula and select course materials for freshmen that are neither below nor above their level of educational experience. Finally, a core curriculum would ensure that all school-children are taught core values upon which any democratic society depends to thrive, and even survivevalues such as tolerance of others with different viewpoints, and respect for others.

　　簡短說明原文觀點的必要性，也為下面的駁論作鋪墊，形似咱們的閱讀了。我們要謹記在心的是它的first of all, in addition, finally,的結構，這是最簡便的分層次論述，但不可用得過多。

　　However, a common curriculum that is also an exclusive one would pose certain problems, which might outweigh the benefits, noted above. First of all, on what basis would certain course work be included or excluded, and who would be the final decision- maker? In all likelihood these decisions would be in the hands of federal legislators and regulators, who are likely to have their own quirky notions of what should and should not be taught to childrennotions that may or may not reflect those of most communities, schools, or parents. Besides, government officials are notoriously susceptible to influence-peddling by lobbyists who do not have the best interests of societys children in mind.

　　這些論據是我們中國學生不便提出來的。但是，他的一些詞句也是需要記下來：outweigh the benefits; On what basis would ? In all likelihood, be in the hands of

　　Secondly, an official, federally sanctioned curriculum would facilitate the dissemination of propaganda and other dogma which because of its biased and one-sided nature undermines the very purpose of true education: to enlighten. I can easily foresee the banning of certain text books, programs, and websites which provide information and perspectives that the government might wish to suppressas some sort of threat to its authority and power. Although this scenario might seem far-fetched, these sorts of concerns are being raised already at the state level.

　　進一步闡述上一段的論點，這一點很重要。我們平時能夠做到這樣就盡量陳列觀點，關鍵要有說服力。

　　有用的詞組：propaganda, dogma, biased/one-sided nature, undermine the very purpose of scenario,

　　Thirdly, the inflexible nature of a uniform national curriculum would preclude the inclusion of programs, courses, and materials that are primarily of regional or local significance. For example, California requires children at certain grade levels to learn about the history of particular ethnic groups who make up the states diverse population. A national curriculum might not allow for this feature, and Californias youngsters would be worse off as a result of their ignorance about the traditions, values, and cultural contributions of all the people whose citizenship they share.

　　Be primarily of significance; be worse off;

　　Finally, it seems to me that imposing a uniform national curriculum would serve to undermine the authority of parents over their own children, to even a greater extent than uniform state laws currently do. Admittedly, laws requiring parents to ensure that their children receive an education that meets certain minimum standards are well-justified, for the reasons mentioned earlier. However, when such standards are imposed by the state rather than at the community level parents are left with far less power to participate meaningfully in the decision-making process. This problem would only be exacerbated were these decisions left exclusively to federal regulators.注意最后一句的倒裝結構。

　　In the final analysis, homogenization of elementary and secondary education would amount to a double-edged sword. While it would serve as an insurance policy against a future populated with illiterates and ignoramuses, at the same time it might serve to obliterate cultural diversity and tradition. The optimal federal approach, in my view, is a balanced one that imposes a basic curriculum yet leaves the rest up to each stateor better yet, to each community.

　　Optimal approach, impose yet, leave up to sb.由誰負責

　　Issue 3

　　A nation should require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer.

　　The speaker would prefer a national curriculum for all children up until college instead of allowing schools in different regions the freedom to decide on their own curricula. I agree insofar as some common core curriculum would serve useful purposes for any nation. At the same time, however, individual states and communities should have some freedom to augment any such curriculum as they see fit; otherwise, a nations educational system might defeat its own purposes in the long term.

　　這是一種不同于前兩篇的開頭：先陳述原文觀點，再有讓步地反對。我們要學習的好句子：I agree insofar as 在某種程度我同意此觀點，因為 at the same time, however,接著陳述自己觀點otherwise,

　　Serve useful purposes for

　　see sth. fit, 覺得合適；

　　defeat ones own purpose

　　in the long/short term

　　A national core curriculum would be beneficial to a nation in a number of respects. First of all, by providing all children with fundamental skills and knowledge, a common core curriculum would help ensure that our children grow up to become reasonably informed, productive members of society. In addition, a common core curriculum would provide a predictable foundation upon which college administrators and faculty could more easily build curricula and select course materials for freshmen that are neither below nor above their level of educational experience. Finally, a core curriculum would ensure that all school-children are taught core values upon which any democratic society depends to thrive, and even survivevalues such as tolerance of others with different viewpoints, and respect for others.

　　簡短說明原文觀點的必要性，也為下面的駁論作鋪墊，形似咱們的閱讀了。我們要謹記在心的是它的first of all, in addition, finally,的結構，這是最簡便的分層次論述，但不可用得過多。

　　However, a common curriculum that is also an exclusive one would pose certain problems, which might outweigh the benefits, noted above. First of all, on what basis would certain course work be included or excluded, and who would be the final decision- maker? In all likelihood these decisions would be in the hands of federal legislators and regulators, who are likely to have their own quirky notions of what should and should not be taught to childrennotions that may or may not reflect those of most communities, schools, or parents. Besides, government officials are notoriously susceptible to influence-peddling by lobbyists who do not have the best interests of societys children in mind.

　　這些論據是我們中國學生不便提出來的。但是，他的一些詞句也是需要記下來：outweigh the benefits; On what basis would ? In all likelihood, be in the hands of

　　Secondly, an official, federally sanctioned curriculum would facilitate the dissemination of propaganda and other dogma which because of its biased and one-sided nature undermines the very purpose of true education: to enlighten. I can easily foresee the banning of certain text books, programs, and websites which provide information and perspectives that the government might wish to suppressas some sort of threat to its authority and power. Although this scenario might seem far-fetched, these sorts of concerns are being raised already at the state level.

　　進一步闡述上一段的論點，這一點很重要。我們平時能夠做到這樣就盡量陳列觀點，關鍵要有說服力。

　　有用的詞組：propaganda, dogma, biased/one-sided nature, undermine the very purpose of scenario,

　　Thirdly, the inflexible nature of a uniform national curriculum would preclude the inclusion of programs, courses, and materials that are primarily of regional or local significance. For example, California requires children at certain grade levels to learn about the history of particular ethnic groups who make up the states diverse population. A national curriculum might not allow for this feature, and Californias youngsters would be worse off as a result of their ignorance about the traditions, values, and cultural contributions of all the people whose citizenship they share.

　　Be primarily of significance; be worse off;

　　Finally, it seems to me that imposing a uniform national curriculum would serve to undermine the authority of parents over their own children, to even a greater extent than uniform state laws currently do. Admittedly, laws requiring parents to ensure that their children receive an education that meets certain minimum standards are well-justified, for the reasons mentioned earlier. However, when such standards are imposed by the state rather than at the community level parents are left with far less power to participate meaningfully in the decision-making process. This problem would only be exacerbated were these decisions left exclusively to federal regulators.注意最后一句的倒裝結構。

　　In the final analysis, homogenization of elementary and secondary education would amount to a double-edged sword. While it would serve as an insurance policy against a future populated with illiterates and ignoramuses, at the same time it might serve to obliterate cultural diversity and tradition. The optimal federal approach, in my view, is a balanced one that imposes a basic curriculum yet leaves the rest up to each stateor better yet, to each community.

　　Optimal approach, impose yet, leave up to sb.由誰負責